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http://thtwzjustadream.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] thtwzjustadream.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] 1_million_words 2013-02-21 05:28 pm (UTC)

I think your example is good. The first sentence is a place that's just like the one I'll see if I go out for lunch in a minute. But we jump more directly into the BoBos' world and their story if we go with....

The sky's always a brilliant shade of sapphire on Ixera, no pollution to alter or obscure it. The sun's rays warm rivers, streams, and billions of acres of untouched flaura and fauna-- but not a single thing of artifice.

The BoBo would be stunned at the riches of sweet, highly oxygenated air just yards away from their stifling, dank warrens -- if they knew it was there to be had.....


And now I'm feeling bad for the poor BoBo! :)

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